Earn bread, or deserve bread?

Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh, from The Hague, c. 11 March 1882

C. M. seems to have spoken with Tersteeg before he came to see me, at least he began by saying the same things about “earning my bread.” My reply came on the spur of the moment, quick, and I believe this is exactly what I said, “Earn bread - how do you mean? Earn bread, or deserve bread? Not to deserve one's bread - that is, to be unworthy of it - is certainly a crime, for every honest man is worthy of his bread; but unluckily, not being able to earn it, though deserving it, is a misfortune, and a great misfortune. So if you say to me, “You are unworthy of your bread,” you insult me. But if you make the rather just remark that I do not always earn it - for sometimes I have none - well, that may be true, but what's the use of making the remark? It does not get me any further if that's all you say.”

So then C. M. didn't talk about “earning bread” any more.

Letter 181
Translation courtesy of Robert Harrison.
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