We must suffer for it
Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh, from The Hague, c. 15 April 1882
There certainly is an affinity between a person and his work, but it is not easy to define what this affinity is, and on that question many judge quite wrongly.
And now, yes, I know that Mother is ill, and I know many other sad things besides, either in our own family or in others'.
And I am not insensible to it, and I don't think I should be able to draw “Sorrow” if I didn't feel it. But since last summer it has become clear to me that the disharmony between Father, Mother and myself has become a chronic evil because there has been misunderstanding and estrangement between us for too long a time. And now it has gone so far that we must suffer for it on both sides.
I mean, we might have helped each other more if long ago we had tried on both sides to live in closer understanding and to share weal and woe, always remembering that parents and children must remain one. We didn't make these mistakes on purpose, and for the greater part they must be ascribed to the force majeure of difficult circumstances and a hurried life. Now I have become little more than a half strange, half tiresome person to Father and Mother; and for my part, when I'm at home, I also have a lonesome, empty feeling. Opinions and professions differ so much that we unintentionally annoy each other, but I repeat, it is quite involuntary. This is a very sad feeling, but life and the world are full of such unsatisfactory relationships, and it really does more harm than good to reproach each other - sometimes the best thing to do in such a case is to avoid each other. But I don't know what's best; I wish I did.
Well, Father and Mother find comfort in their work and I in mine. For, brother, in spite of all the little miseries, I work with great animation.
Letter 187
Translation courtesy of Robert Harrison.
Back to The Way of Vincent: Making art no matter what
There certainly is an affinity between a person and his work, but it is not easy to define what this affinity is, and on that question many judge quite wrongly.
And now, yes, I know that Mother is ill, and I know many other sad things besides, either in our own family or in others'.
And I am not insensible to it, and I don't think I should be able to draw “Sorrow” if I didn't feel it. But since last summer it has become clear to me that the disharmony between Father, Mother and myself has become a chronic evil because there has been misunderstanding and estrangement between us for too long a time. And now it has gone so far that we must suffer for it on both sides.
I mean, we might have helped each other more if long ago we had tried on both sides to live in closer understanding and to share weal and woe, always remembering that parents and children must remain one. We didn't make these mistakes on purpose, and for the greater part they must be ascribed to the force majeure of difficult circumstances and a hurried life. Now I have become little more than a half strange, half tiresome person to Father and Mother; and for my part, when I'm at home, I also have a lonesome, empty feeling. Opinions and professions differ so much that we unintentionally annoy each other, but I repeat, it is quite involuntary. This is a very sad feeling, but life and the world are full of such unsatisfactory relationships, and it really does more harm than good to reproach each other - sometimes the best thing to do in such a case is to avoid each other. But I don't know what's best; I wish I did.
Well, Father and Mother find comfort in their work and I in mine. For, brother, in spite of all the little miseries, I work with great animation.
Letter 187
Translation courtesy of Robert Harrison.
Back to The Way of Vincent: Making art no matter what
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