Sometimes I think they are very ugly

Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh, from Saint-Remy, 7 December 1889

Among the studies you will find the following which are for Mother and our sister: "Olives", "Bedroom", "Reaper", "Ploughing", "Wheat Field with Cypresses", "Orchard in Blossom", "Portrait". The rest are mostly studies of autumn, and I think that the best is the yellow mulberry tree against a bright blue sky - then the study of the house and the park, of which there are two variations. They are giving me a lot of trouble, and sometimes I think they are very ugly, sometimes they seem good to me; perhaps you will have the same impression when you see them.

I hope you are well. For myself I have nothing to complain of, I am feeling absolutely normal, so to speak, but without an idea for the future, and really I do not know what is going to happen, and perhaps I rather avoid facing this question, feeling that I can do nothing about it.

Letter 618
Translation courtesy of Robert Harrison.
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